As soon as I think I'm done with this assclown (and now "this assclown and his alien hermaphrodite snake-skinned love-beast") he goes and makes a fool of himself once again, this time at the douchebaggiest place of all, the MTV Video Music Awards. Kanye, not being afraid of looking like a toolbox, hopped up onstage last night or whenever it happened, and jacked the microphone from 19-year-old country star Taylor Swift, and proceeded to say that "Beyonce has the best video of the decade!". Beyonce, who was beat out by Taylor, seemed mortified when Kanye opened his big mouth. Since everyone in the whole-damn-world got pissed at him, he decided to write an appology:

I'M SOOOOO SORRY TO TAYLOR SWIFT AND HER FANS AND HER MOM. I SPOKE TO HER MOTHER RIGHT AFTER AND SHE SAID THE SAME THING MY MOTHER WOULD'VE SAID. SHE IS VERY TALENTED! I LIKE THE LYRICS ABOUT BEING A CHEERLEADER AND SHE'S IN THE BLEACHERS! ........................
I'M IN THE WRONG FOR GOING ON STAGE AND TAKING AWAY FROM HER MOMENT!.................
BEYONCE'S VIDEO WAS THE BEST OF THIS DECADE!!!! I'M SORRY TO MY FANS IF I LET YOU GUYS DOWN!!!! I'M SORRY TO MY FRIENDS AT MTV. I WILL APOLOGIZE TO TAYLOR 2MRW. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!!!! EVERYBODY WANNA BOOOOO ME BUT I'M A FAN OF REAL POP CULTURE!!! NO DISRESPECT BUT WE WATCHIN' THE SHOW AT THE CRIB RIGHT NOW CAUSE ... WELL YOU KNOW!!!! I'M STILL HAPPY FOR TAYLOR!!!! BOOOYAAAWWWW!!!! YOU ARE VERY VERY TALENTED!!! I GAVE MY AWARDS TO OUTKAST WHEN THEY DESERVED IT OVER ME... THAT'S WHAT IT IS!!!!!!! I'M NOT CRAZY YALL, I'M JUST REAL. SORRY FOR THAT!!! I REALLY FEEL BAD FOR TAYLOR AND I'M SINCERELY SORRY!!! MUCH RESPECT!!!!!

Wow. Somebody smack this guy with a grammar book. Preferably one with barbed wire wrapped around it. What is this "Welcome to the real world...I'm a fan of real pop culture?" crap? Really, what does that mean? Does that mean he has a whole basement dedicated to Twilight stuff? Does he enjoy witty 80's movie references? Does it mean he's a homosexual aquatic being?

The world will never know. Only Kanye knows, in his warped mind where he can do no wrong. Clearly he wasn't beat enough as a child, whether in his home or on the playground at school. Messing with Taylor Swift, however, has drawn the ire of 99% of the country world and probably 90% of the rest of the music business. Hopefully someone will pull a will.i.am and get somebody to slug him in the face.

Labels: celebrities, gay fish, idiot celebrities, idiots, Kanye West, morons